Focus on What You can Control and Be Grateful
As you learn to appreciate and to love yourself, you come to realize that life is about choices and consequences. Each choice you make has its consequences. When you make a choice and don’t like its consequences, you can always make another choice with different consequences. However, life is such that there are things we can control and change. There are also things we cannot control or change. You can control and change your career but not your age, or the hours in a day. To be happy in life learn to focus on the things you can control and change. Also, learn to be grateful for what you have and the good things in your life.
In life some things or situations are unfair. Your business may go down in the economic meltdown. Your spouse may die. An earthquake or hurricane may flatten your home. Your boss may be a ‘monster’. Yet, you can be in control of your life. So, to love yourself and lead a happy life you must stop focusing on things you cannot control. Know that there is a silver lining in every cloud. Everything that happens does so for a reason. Learn to deal with unfairness by looking for the little good thing in it. Remember the saying “that things don’t get better till they get worst.”?
Start focusing on the things you can change. What positive thing can you do in the situation? What good can come from it? If defeat overtakes you, don’t use all your time counting your losses. Spare some time to look for your gains. You may find your gains are more than your losses. Stop fighting the inevitable. Accept it. In fact, this is the first step to overcoming the effects of any misfortune. You will then have time, creativity and energy to deal with the problems you can solve. Sure, your business has failed. Yet, this also gives you an opportunity to move to another city.
You could also start a different business that is more attuned to your real interests or passion. It may give you a chance to travel, see the world and get a fresh outlook. Remember that when nature takes anything from you it will always replace it with something of a higher value, something better. Focus on doing the best you can and the replacement will soon reveal itself. Stop blaming others, you victimize yourself. When you blame others, you avoid taking responsibility. So, you disempower yourself. You become a victim and not a player in the situation. Loving yourself entails taking responsibility, it means looking after yourself.
If something has gone wrong, take time to find the root cause of the problem. If it’s your mistake own up. Making mistakes is part of learning and gaining experience. You will not love yourself if you cannot accept your mistakes. Also, you will never grow till you learn from your mistakes. True, you can find yourself in bad situations not of your making. In that case too, you must not accept victimization. In fact, take the situation as an opportunity to become a stronger and better person. Know and believe that tough situations are a blessing in disguise. Take action instead of feeling sorry for yourself. Sow your dreams, even in these opposing circumstances.
- Clear your mind of clutter, release yourself from fear, laziness, and negativity. Also, rid yourself of indecision, thoughts of scarcity or feelings of neediness. This will enable you to give most of your attention to your objectives, goals and vision. In fact, you will be more confident about what you are doing. So you will love yourself more and handle the situation better.
- You were created to be deployed. Let your objectives, aims and vision guide your actions. So, have a clear Vision. Hence, decide what you want to happen in a given situation and in life.
- Be focused on a specific purpose and try to achieve a tangible goal.
- Know your resources and use them to the most.
- Let go of excess baggage. Focus on what is important and avoid time wasters.
- Differentiate between priorities and the good thing. In this way you will be able to get the most out of the trying situation.
- Keep anxious thoughts from your mind. Focus on your dream. Live in the future of you desire.
- Know yourself. Be aware of your thoughts and feelings. Which voices, are you listening to, of the past or of the future, to the voices of despair or of hope.
- Stop being led by other people’s opinions or approval. Live your life, it’s the only one you have.
- Take control of your life. So, decide your area of play. What would you want to happen and when would you want it to happen?
Adversity is part of life. So, don’t let it keep you down. Stop focusing on the things you cannot control and take responsibility for the outcome you want. Take action that will lead you in the direction of your goals and dreams. Furthermore, it is important when you are in a difficult situation to give unconditional love. Focusing on the needs of the others helps you control negative feelings and emotions. For example, fear, anxiety, doubt, indecisiveness, panic, and depression.
These emotions are likely to plague you in an adverse situation, and paralyze or throw you off course. Continuing to offer unconditional love in adverse situations keeps you calm and of clear mind. You also get focused and goal oriented, and above all you are full of faith, hope and optimism. So, take stock of your life. Determine what is valuable, hence worth keeping and the dead stock that binds you to the past and must be got rid of. Also, appreciate what you have and the good things in your life.
Great people have self-knowledge. They are also aware of their talents, gifts and passions. These people use their talents and passions to build great visions of things they want to achieve. Successful people develop greater understanding of the needs and opportunities around them. Great people take initiative to meet these needs. They also exploit the opportunities by employing their talents and gifts. They serve and inspire people. Great people use principles that govern growth and prosperity. In fact, these principles bring out the best and purest in a person. They ensure physical, mental and spiritual well being.
Great people know the secret of a loving, happy and fulfilling life is to be grateful. That is why they tithe and give to charity. They also contribute to other worthy causes for the benefit the less privileged and the disadvantaged. Learn to be grateful for what you have, where you are, what you do, TC. Stop taking things for granted. Be grateful for the good in your life.
Consider how many things could have gone wrong but didn’t. Just read or listen to the NEWS on TV, radio, computer, or on your tech gadget. What do you see? There are terror attacks, wars, and killings innocent people. You will see drought ravaging corners of the planet earth, and all manner of accidents. There is bombing and maiming of innocent people, gangster killings, violent robberies, and murders. There is rape, disease, all manner of crime, and poverty.
All these are not just on the NEWS channels. In fact, they are real events affecting people. The victims are people! And here we are, sitting in comfortable chairs, may be seeping a beverage and reading! Are you not fortunate? Don’t you feel blessed and fortunate? Take a moment and appreciate all your blessings in life. Whether you are religious or not you will admit there is a power, a force governing the universe.
Learn the habit of offering gratitude of prayer. If you understand it well it can become the greatest of all factors to helping you lead a fulfilling life. It will help to lead a life full of love and happiness. Prayer will give you peace of mind where everything else has failed. It will also reveal to you how to draw on the powers of the universe. More so, it will help you to use them for the achievement of your mission or dreams in life.
Condition your mind through prayers of gratitude for the blessings you now enjoy. In this way, whenever you need guidance you will have earned the right and can expect it. Don’t wait till you are in need or have been overtaken by an emergency before going to prayer. If you go into prayer only when in need or in emergencies, you will do so with the negative expectation. So, you are unlikely to receive an answer to your prayer. Will you have the right to expect an answer?
So, say thank you for what you have, remember;
- Your privilege of freedom of action and speech in a country that is rich in all blessing.
- The soundness of your physical body, and your creativity.
- Your inalienable right to the complete direction and control of your mind. Hence, you can achieve any mission or dream you want.
- The loyalty of your loved ones and friends, who inspire you to seek the respect of yourself and the world.
- Your power to transform adversity, defeat and opposition into a creative force. This force can also aid you in the attainment of your goals and to a fulfilling and happy life.
- Your privilege of forgiving others who may injure or offend you.
- Your power to control all your emotions and transform them into a motivating force. Furthermore, this force can help you in the achievement of your dreams and mission in life.
- All those who may have or come to your aid in emergencies, when your own resources are inadequate and can’t solve the problem.
Express Your Gratitude Also By
Being Generous: It is a universal truth that if you give without expecting anything in return, you will receive in a greater measure. Those who have are the ones who can give. By giving, you will know that you are blessed to have. It will also enable you to give and receive love. Also, being generous enables you learn to appreciate to the good in others and in yourself. Furthermore, you get feelings of contentment and fulfillment. You feel alive and energetic. Life becomes beautiful!
Volunteer: Volunteer for a worthy cause. You can volunteer to assist people in the fringes of society, the marginal people such as the old, orphans and the disadvantaged. You will see life from a different angle, and learn to love yourself and other more. Lastly, by volunteering you give back to the universe. And the universe gives back to you. It becomes a cycle of good tidings.
Good Actions: Being good to others has a great positive impact. In fact, good actions produce positive energy that attracts good tidings, love and happiness.
Help Others: You can help in many ways. You can offer physical help like helping a child cross a busy street. Likewise, you can give mental help such as being a mentor, and material help like giving food and clothing to orphans. Also, you can provide spiritual help like guiding someone to gain enlightenment. In fact, helping others makes you aware of how blessed and fortunate you are. It makes you value and appreciate yourself more. Helping others also is a way of giving back to the universe, and of completing the cycle of good tidings.
Tithe: First of all, tithing is a universal law like the law of gravity! In fact, tithing multiplies your resources. It is a secret great people know. So, by tithing you offer gratitude and appreciate the good the powers of the universe have done you. It also frees you from feelings of scarcity and neediness that crowd love out of your life.
Learn to focus on the things that you can control and change. Make the choices that will give the results you want. When you make a choice and don’t like its consequences, you can always make another choice with different consequences. Also, accept what you cannot change or control. Lastly, learn to be grateful. Learn the habit of offering gratitude of prayer. If you understand it well it can become the greatest of all factors to helping you lead a fulfilling life.